A man should seek a woman who…
1. Fears God and whose hope is in the Lord God.
Her life is going to be a reflection of where her hope is. If a young lady's
hope is in any place other than the Lord, the young who marries her is going to
spend the rest of his life trying to help his wife catch a butterfly. It isn't
going to happen.
2. Honors her parents. There is so much
baggage today being brought into marriages based upon dysfunctional
relationships with Mom and Dad. And even though this impacts both the husband
and the wife, If she has a hard time honoring her parents, she will have a hard
time honoring you. Find someone who has or is working to have a healthy
relationship with her parents.
3. Knows how to ask
for forgiveness, admit she's wrong, grant forgiveness, and give grace when you
fail her. This isn't just a one-way street. Both of you are going to need
to do that.
4. Wants to be a wife
and a mother. There are some young ladies who want to be married, but don't
really want to be a wife and a mother. They want to be married, but they want
their career to be their number-one pursuit. I believe the scriptures teach
that a wife's number-one pursuit should be ministering to her husband and
family. That means if you choose to have children, your priorities and values
have already been determined.
5. Displays character in her modest dress. A young man's character
is displayed in his choices around life—around the use of money and
relationships. But a woman's character is displayed in how she handles the
power of her femininity and sexuality. In other words—how modest is she? That's
becoming a weird word in our culture, but I would challenge young men to keep
their eyes out for young women whose character is displayed in not only on the
inside, but the outside as well.
6. Knows how to
follow a man. That doesn't mean perfection, but it does mean that she understands
that she's the vice president, not the president. Women are joint heirs of the
grace of God, but someone has to make the final decision when you both
disagree. When one person votes one way, and the other person votes another, I
believe it's the responsibility of the husband to listen carefully and wisely
consider the counsel of his wife. It's upon him and to the Lordship of Jesus
Christ as being led in the power of the Holy Spirit to make that decision, and
then it's upon the wife to be able to follow under the same influence. That's
not an easy thing in this culture.
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