The Trap For Sexual Abuse by Pst. Mrs. Faith Abiola Oyedepo

What is Sexual Abuse? Sexual abuse can be defined as when you're being touched in a way you don't like, you're being forced to have sex, you're forced to look at sexual pictures or videos, you're made to watch someone do something sexual (this can include someone flashing or exposing themselves to you; this can be via webcam, pictures or in person), you're made to do something sexual to someone that feels uncomfortable or wrong; again, this can be online or in the real world.

The trap for sexual abuse or some behaviours that may raise concern include, when someone pays unusual or unnecessary attention to you, seeks opportunities to spend uninterrupted time alone with you, frequently buys you expensive gifts or gives you money, often walks into the bathroom while you are there. It also includes when someone shows unusual interest in your sexuality (for example makes comments about your body), pursues physical contact with you through hugging, touching, tickling, wrestling, even when you have indicated that you don’t like it, spends most of his free time with you, rather than with persons of his calibre, asks to take you on overnight trips alone, frequently offers to care for you, or asks if you can keep secrets, etc.

However, this is where the necessity for the Spirit of God comes in. It helps you as a child of God to discern what is pure and of negative intention (1 Corinthians 12:4-11). As explained in the above paragraph, if anyone comes around with contrary motives, the Spirit of God in you will make you uncomfortable with such individuals. In other words, if you choose to focus upon the Word of God, you will be enabled to be spiritually discerning.

Since every person and situation is different, victims of sexual abuse respond in various ways. The number of occurrences is staggering. But more staggering than the number of occurrences, is the acute damage done to the victim. The effects are physical, social, emotional, psychological and spiritual.

After a person has been sexually abused, he/she often experiences a range of feelings and reactions. Though these individuals cope in their own way, some have very strong responses after being sexually abused, while others are calm or numb. Some feelings and reactions might be experienced directly after the abuse or days and weeks later. Understanding that these feelings are normal and experienced by others who have been sexually abused, may make the feelings and reactions less frightening.

Immediate physical effects may be pain and bodily injuries, especially if the perpetrator used force. It may also include: bruises, broken bones, STIs, nausea, vomiting, headaches, and pregnancy. Longer-term physical effects may be disturbed sleep patterns, nightmares, insomnia, loss of appetite, stomach pains, etc.

Sexual abuse also causes harmful emotional, psychological, or physiological effects that are more severe than the effects of other crimes. These effects include self-blame, shame, guilt (or embarrassment), anxiety, stress (or fear), shock, impaired memory, confusion (or disorientation), anger, hostility (or aggression), sexualized behaviours (sexual perversion), denial, irritability, erratic mood swings, depression or despair, social withdrawal, decreased energy and motivation, suicidal thoughts, etc.

After all said, I like to introduce to you, friend, the surer escape route from sexual abuse – Jesus. Acknowledging Him as your Lord and personal Saviour will give Him access to leading and guiding you away from sexual abuse at any point in time in life.

Are you set to confess your sins and allow Jesus into your life? If you are, please say this prayer of faith from your heart loud and clear: Dear Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins. Cleanse me with Your precious Blood. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Now I know I am born again!
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